Here’s the deal. I love you guys. No really. I think you’re great. I like that I can walk to you. I like that you are local. I like that, aside from the restaurant-mafia groups that own a large percentage of you, you’re still basically not chains and you’re special.

But lately . . . well, lately, I’ve had some concerns. It started awhile back when I noticed some of your signs leaving a lot to be desired in the grammar department. I’m starting to think it’s an unfortunate trend.

Is it a huge deal? No, of course not. Then again, you DO want me to spend money on you, right? You want me to show you off to out of town guests? Point out your assets? Talk you up?

The latest commercial failure can be found here. It’s the main attraction under your “mediakit” heading. And well, c’mon, “mediakit” - self-identified spokes-documents that get it wrong? On the first page of your private event information pdf alone, I found 4 errors. (Question: “Central Valley” - to capitalize or not to capitalize, that is the question. You do it once, but skip it elsewhere. I say capitalize it. Always. At least the way you are using it.)

Did you proofread? Even a little. I mean, really, you even use the word “incredible” inappropriately. Combine that with other sloppy errors and it makes me think you are . . .

Incredible.

I know, I know, I’m hard on you, Sacramento business. But only because I want to be proud of you. I know you can do better.

These mistakes make you look like those girls we currently see about town, so exited to get into summer with strapy and open-toed shoes, yet unable to embrace the unfortunate reality that toes hanging off the edge, flapping in the pre-summer breeze are horrific: it looks like you almost care, but just can’t pull it off.

I hope you can shape up a bit before summer really gets started. Because I want to spend evenings out with you, I really do. You’re just making it hard for me to want to pay too much to do so.

With love,
me